Relationships cause introspection
January 3, 2011
Have you ever sat down and thought to yourself, why does the whole world try so hard to be in a relationship?
It seems so strange to me that people want more than anything to attach themselves to someone permanently. Why do we want to allow someone so much into our lives that they affect our decisions and, at times, hold us back?
I feel like human beings are much more selfish than that. But then why do we seek companionship? Why do we want so very badly for someone to own us? Why isn’t it enough to own ourselves?
I thought at first that human relationships simply stemmed from the lengthy period of time that it takes to raise a child. That we hold onto another person because we couldn’t handle raising our kids on our own. But this still didn’t feel like the right answer to me. It doesn’t explain the people who stay together for life but never even consider having children, or the parents who are able to, no matter how difficult, raise a child by themselves. Why then, does everyone spend so much time searching for their “soulmate”?
The answer hit me, suddenly. We seek companionship because we want so desperately for someone to find meaning in us so that we can find meaning in ourselves.
I don’t think I’m any kind of expert on relationships; in fact, I know I most definitely am not. What I do know is that when I look for someone to be with, that is what I will look for. For someone who shows me something about myself that I never would’ve found on my own.
The thing about human beings is that most of us try and put on this mask like we know what’s going on. Really, none of us have any idea, especially when it comes to ourselves. If I know one thing about myself it’s that I don’t have a clue who I am or where I’m trying to go. I can only hope that someday, someone will be willing to find the way with me.